Monday, June 15, 2009

Why Mary Poppins ruined a whole generation of children

I won’t go into most of what I think about Mary Poppins*, like about the fact that she is one of the most pretentious characters of all time who doesn’t grow or change throughout the movie, who even admits right at the beginning that she is practically perfect in every way. I’m not going to talk about how the woman can’t even laugh and join the party on the ceiling when everyone around her is laughing. I’m not going to talk about how the whole entire movie everyone tries to make me like her by telling me that everybody loves Mary and how jolly of a holiday it is when Mary is around.

What I really want to talk about is the other message of Mary Poppins. Go with me if you will to the scene in the movie where Mary is singing the children to sleep. Feed the birds, tuppence a bag, tuppence, tuppence, tuppence a bag. Ahh, yes, you can imagine it—the sleepy eyes of the children, the hauntingly beautiful voice of Mary Poppins, the flashes to the bird lady. Why wouldn’t the children want to feed the birds after that? After all, the poor little things are starving, they have babies, their nests are empty! Oh no! The birds are going to die! Hurry feed them! The saints and apostles are looking down on you and they are smiling when you give your tuppence to feed the birds. 

.....Wait, are these birds wild? Has the bird lady made these birds dependant upon her by feeding them so much? Is Mary asking the children to waste their money on feeding birds that by nature can take care of themselves?

Cut to a few minutes later—Jane and Michael in the bank. Mr. Banks is trying to talk to his son about how smart it is to invest your money. Out walks the banks guys. Holy Cow, these guys are creepy. Long beards, hunched over, decrepit looking guys. Give us your money, is what Michael hears as they dance around like zombies. I remember as a kid being terrified of the bank guys. I always thought, run away Michael, run from those horrible people asking you to soundly invest your money. Hurry! Go find the bird lady who is asking you to throw away your money. Give her your tuppence before it is too late!

And we wonder why consumer debt is so high. We wonder why we never wanted to save and invest our money. We wonder why we want to spend it on frivolous things. It’s Mary Poppins fault. ☺

Now, my sister is in town and we are going to get on my boat and go tubing. LOL

*Mary Poppins was one of my favorite movies growing up.


  1. Kasie, are you also going to try and tell me that all chimney sweeps aren't jovial, lucky chaps who perform death-defying dance routines on English rooftops??

    No. I do not accept that.

  2. Umm, okay? I got more of a "give to the needy" vibe from that part, but I guess I can see your point.

    And Mary is a proper British Nanny—there is no way in hell she'd fly on a ceiling. Jolly or not.

    From the very dorky, and yet awesome movie, What A Girl Wants with Amanda Bynes, "I'm British, child, we only show affection to dogs and horses."

  3. LOL, that was a hoot. I think Miz Kasie should rewrite the whole Mary Poppins movie for modern children.

    I'll take the creepoid bank guys anytime over the Wizard of Oz flying monkeys. *shudder*

  4. I just love Dick Van Dyke. He is hot. That's all.

  5. Damn that Mary Poppins! And all this time I thought it was Visa's fault ;)

  6. LOL what an imagination you have:))

  7. Wow! I'm glad I now know who to blame. Thanks, Kasie.

  8. Mary Poppins has always freaked me out. Don't ask me why. She just does.

  9. I've been anticipating this post. It did not disappoint!

  10. You are so funny! Mary Poppins kind of creeped me out as a child. I don't really know why.

    @Natalie: I LOVE What a Girl Wants! That show is so dorky, but hilarious!

  11. No wonder I'm so dang smart; I've never been brainwashed by Mary Poppins. I have no fears of bank guys--I married one.

    Wow, is there therapy or a 12-step program for those aflicted?

    Somebody needs to write a book about this.

  12. Oh, I forgot you know the truth about me. It's so much easier to say I've never seen it than to say I saw the begining before getting kicked out of the theater due to a certain brother.

    So maybe I'm 10% brainwashed--which explains why I'm poor and unemployed.

  13. Suzanne, nobody ever said anything about the chimney sweeps who in my opinion are the best part of the movie.

    Nat, what??? Give to the poor? That's what she was trying to tell me? Man, I better go watch it again. :) I love "What a Girl Wants" and that line you quoted is so funny, I hadn't remembered that line.

    Angie, ew, the flying monkeys. Yes, they are on a whole other level of creepy. Rewrite Mary Poppins for modern children? Hmmm. That's an idea. Perhaps someone else should do it though, I'm afraid if I did it would end up being a satire.

  14. Jessie, Dick Van Dyke made that movie. He was awesome.

    Tess, I know, it's nice to know who's really at fault right?

    Terri, it is a curse. LOL

    Lois, you're welcome. :) Blame away.

    Carrie, Yay! A kindred spirit.

    Candi, I'm not sure it was as awesome as I built it up to be, but you have done your best friend duty by telling me it was. Thanks. :)

  15. Chantele, yes, creepy. I'm glad I'm not alone. :) And I love that movie too.

    Tricia, I married a bank guy too. As long as he doesn't start carrying a cane or growing a long white beard I think I'll be okay. :) And yes, don't try to trick me, I know a little too much of the truth about you. LOL

  16. Maybe we should start looking at other childhood movies to blame for our problems. Like Cinderella, she's the reason we all want small feet.

  17. I just had to say that me and my wee ones ADORE Mary poppins. It has been a saviour on many occasions for us, and I'm willing to chance it if means peace and quiet LOL

  18. All I have to say is I'd take Mary Poppins over Nanny 911 any day.

    And Jessie: LOL

  19. You know what? I don't think I've ever seen that movie! huhn....

  20. Patti, great idea. We can start a series of "who to blame" posts. :)

    Jennifer, don't say I didn't warn you. LOL Just kidding, this post actually came to me while my son was watching Mary Poppins, so it's obviously not banned from my house.

    Renee, that's a close call for me. It depends on which one of the nanny's from that show you're referring to. Now Jo from Super Nanny scares me, but she is very effective and I wouldn't mind her whipping my children into shape. :)

    Kathryn, wow, really? Maybe you've just proven my point. You are normal....wait a minute.... :)

  21. Deep thoughts here. Mary Poppins...the lady with the cool bag. That was the coolest part of the while movie, I think.

    PS: Hope you enjoyed your boating excursion!