Monday, May 30, 2011

Maddeningly Unhelpful Monday--Make Good Friends

This may be my most helpful Monday post ever. Don't worry, I'll try to shove some nonsense in here somewhere. But my Monday advice to you today is to make good friends. My new blog is the result of one of my very dear friends, Natalie Whipple. Isn't my header pretty?? She drew it. She's talented like that. She's one of those people who hogged all the talents in life and didn't leave any for the rest of us. She can write, draw, cook and has excellent fashion sense. (Plus, she's hot, but I don't know if that qualifies as a talent. It's really just a fact.) So when I was searching the blogosphere for some writers to stalk until they became my friends, you can see why I chose Natalie.

Just kidding, I didn't stalk her.....did I? Hmm, maybe I did.

Which leads me to my second bit of advice relating to this topic. Surround yourself with supportive people who know your goals. Don't keep your writing hidden. The more people you tell, the more likely you are to complete your goals. And you might find out that some other people you know have the same goal. When I first started writing, I kept it to myself. Then one day I told my best friend Candi and much to my surprise, found out she was writing too. Together we formed our first support group. Without those initial "meetings" I might not have had the motivation to continue, especially during the times I really wanted to quit. But by that time, I had told so many people that it made quitting hard. That's a good thing.

So tell people you're writing (including family. My sisters have been the best cheerleaders ever). Surround yourself with other writers who are at the same stage of the journey as you are. Support each other. Share your work with each other and grow in the business together. I've had the same critique group (with one or two more recent additions) for going on three years now. I wouldn't have gotten this far without them.

20 comments:

  1. This post is making me sad because my best writing buddy moved to Germany and I sure miss getting together with her. I've been thinking lately how I'm in dire need of a new writing group. I guess it's time to attend another conference so that I can meet some more great writers. Thanks for the reminder!

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  2. Kate, I feel you. Most of my writing friends moved away too. The others I made online. Thank goodness for the internet. It makes keeping in contact easier.

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  3. I like your new look--it's so pretty! Natalie is very talented!

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  4. Great tip about telling everyone! When I set out to write A WHOLE BOOK, I told everyone so I'd be ashamed to admit that I'd abandoned the project. :) It took a few years, but I'm finally in the home editing stretch.

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  5. I've been writing for years and there are still a lot of people who have no idea. Why is it so scary? It's not like they don't already think I'm weird.

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  6. Love the new look! So glad you've had supportive friends, family, and writing partners to see you through your journey. Wishing you all the success you can handle!

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  7. Love your new blog header! I didn't tell anyone I wrote for a long time. Then when I did, I couldn't figure out why I was so scared in the first place! lol :)

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  8. You are so right -- a good support group is essential for a writer's sanity. :)

    Oh, and I love your header! Good job, Natalie.

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  9. When I clicked over to your blog I immediately thought, She got a Natalie makeover!! And I was right! Lucky!

    I am so lucky to have you to support me. Those meetings were the best! I really don't know if I would still be writing if it weren't for you. :)

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  10. What a cute header...and I'd say being hot does count:)

    Such good advice! What would us writers, who lock ourselves behind closed doors hanging out with characters all day, do without REAL people to help us along the way.

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  11. You're right! This post was helpful. Very wise advice, Kasie. And your header and new blog look are awesome! :-)

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  12. Both you and Renee have blog makeovers. Mine still has a boring white background. Now I feel pressure to make it pretty. You forgot about the part that it is important to have writing friends that you DON'T like. Because when you run out of things to talk about you can talk about how much you DON'T like each other.

    Are we ever going to be friends?

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  13. This is totally helpful. I feel cheated. ;-) Love the header! And you're right, good friends are intensely helpful!

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  14. ABSOLUTELY love the new look of your blog!! YAY for good friends <3

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  15. You should really have a comment section on your other tabs because I wanted to make all kinds of comments while reading them. Your "About Me" page and your "FAQ" page...priceless.

    P.S. You can tell Jared that when his picture is placed under Adam and Hugh he kind of looks like a composite of the two. :)

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  16. I didn't tell people I was writing either. And now that it's online and I can't take it back, I've found how supportive all these other writers can be! I am still looking for a solid critique group though. How did you find people you can trust and who's opinion you value?

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  17. K.D. Sorry it took me a few days to answer your question. I was out of town and then I completely forgot it was sitting here waiting for an answer. The way I found my critique group is really just getting to know people through blogs. It didn't happen over night or anything. I just built a relationship through reading and commenting on blogs. I think blogs are a great representation of someone's style/personality. So if you like reading a blog, you'll probably enjoy that person's writing as well. There will be some people you "click" with online and some you don't. I know that seems strange but you will. Just put your self out there. Keep commenting and keep writing.

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  18. I had a pretty good writing group in college but haven't found anybody to gel with since I moved to the LA area.. gah! 8 years ago now! It's hard! But also, important to put yourself out there!

    headed off to take own advice...sigh.

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  19. Friendship is the be best thing in the world i got lot of friends with the help of this top social networking site for women this will really make more friends for you. women club

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