Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Google It

I love to look at my stats and see who is visiting me, where they are from, and how they find me. Many people find my site through google, searching for things such as (and these are real): "huge wimp" (yes, I admit to saying that on my blog several times), "i've got no taste buds" (I feel sorry for this person because I'm sure my post about my son's ability to eat anything did not help their situation), and "kasie hot" (I like that one, but they probably learned right away they didn't find the right Kasie). But the most googled subject on my blog is variations of this: "reasons to stop going to the gym" (with a close second being "cold towels")

I know, it's disappointing. It has nothing to do with writing. But, I'm sure they're disappointed when they get here too, because this is the post this google search would lead them to on my blog: Gym post

But because I am a giving person, I have decided to oblige these people who are looking for good excuses to stop going to the gym. On Friday, I'm going to post the Top 10 reasons why you should stop going to the gym. I would love your help though. I've come up with a few. For example: *It's swine flu season and every surface in every gym is covered in swine flu germs. I have my health to think about. Or how about: *I wouldn't want to get caught in the middle of a steroid-fueled fight.

So what about you. Give me some real reasons or some funny ones of why people should avoid the gym.

Monday, September 28, 2009

Maddeningly Unhelpful Advice--Grief

Someone asked me how I handle trials/adversity in my life (okay, no one asked me, but I will pretend for the sake of this post) and I said, let me tell you. First, I try to ignore them, because we all know that if we ignore things they eventually go away. If they don't go away, I shut myself in my room, and play bejeweled blitz on Facebook for a while, because I just know that if I can reach 100,000k then I will feel much better about myself and in my new state of mind all problems will disappear. I learn quickly that one, I'm not very good at this game, and two, because I'm not good, it makes me feel worse about myself and anyone whose score is higher than mine. (In fact, if your score is higher than mine, just know that you are on my secret enemy list) Once I reach the peak of frustration over not being good at this game, I stop playing only to find that the world has not, in fact, stopped like I thought it should out of respect for my problems. Next I try to plot how to make the world stop while I'm having trials so that I don't miss anything. And that is the stage I am in right now. If anyone has succeeded in getting the world to stop and wait for you to get through your problems, please share this information.

Now, let me tell you how the most graceful woman in the world handles her adversity: My friend. Saturday night her son (that I spoke of in my post on Friday) passed away. Yesterday afternoon, I was able to sit and visit with her. She told me she is worried about her 11 year old daughter. That she hopes she can find the right counselor to help her daughter through her grief. She told me that she hopes she can convey to her surviving four children that even though she loves her little boy, each of her children are important and special to her and her grief will not make her overlook them. She said she wasn't sure how she was going to get out of bed Sunday morning, but she prayed and asked God to help her make it through each hour one step at a time. And at that hour she said, He was holding her up. There is a long road ahead, but I have no doubt that with a woman like her leading her family, they will make it through this.

Friday, September 25, 2009

Tomorrow always comes

I find false comfort in the numbness.
It protects me like armor.
But the foe strikes from within,
Threatening to crack the fragile facade.

Last night my friend's 11 year old daughter pulled her 2 year old brother out of the family pool. He is in critical condition. Please pray for him and the 11 year old girl who cried in my arms last night.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Goal Making

If I learned one thing on twitter yesterday (yes, twitter, the key to all knowledge) it was that making goals is good and breaking them is even better (Mmm chocolate mint cookies). No, wait, that’s not what I learned. I learned that making unattainable goals is bad (Natalie is full of sage wisdom). For example my goal to forego chocolate for a week was a bad, bad goal because chocolate is like a food group to me. It was a goal begging to be broken. My goal should’ve been to limit my chocolate consumption (or ONLY eat chocolate as Natalie also suggested).

One of my goals for many moons now has been to be better at making regular posts on my blog. Why has this been such a hard goal for me to keep? After all, I am a writer, and I love to talk about myself. Those two things alone should make me the world’s best blogger. The problem is that I make the goal and never give myself the structure I need to accomplish it. I just say, voila, make it so (I say this to myself, mostly in my head). So I was thinking about some of your blogs, especially those of you who are better at being consistent bloggers. And I noticed that a lot of you have scheduled days where you do certain things. Like Natalie does a sketch every Saturday, which I’m always anxious to see. Renee does photoshop Fridays that I look forward to every week. Kiersten generally does funny poems on Mondays. (Note to the aforementioned people: please do not feel pressured by my citation of your schedule to feel like you must now do these things forever. Although, if you don’t my whole concept of the universe [or at least blogosphere] might shatter.)

So, because I like to live on the edge (as evidenced by driving my car until the ‘miles 'til empty’ read 1. I know, it was daring.) I am going to make a goal again. A blog goal…with structure. I will write on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays. And at least one of those days is going to be a themed day (still debating on what theme is). Like the Jack Sparrow (what? he's a real person) quote under my name suggests, my posts will probably be completely unhelpful, especially to anything writing related (like they always have been). If you want awesome advice on writing, go see Michelle, she is really good at helpful writing advice.

I think I’ve just discovered my theme with all this rambling: Maddeningly unhelpful advice Monday. Yes, that sounds very doable. Why not start off the week with Maddeningly unhelpful advice from me. I suddenly feel like my goal is attainable. Thanks for listening to me ramble. Man, this should’ve been Monday's post because I think it was a very unhelpful take on goal making.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

"Fun" Run

Meet the culprits: Misti and Elizabeth (center and right in photo). They may seem sweet and innocent, but do not trust their beautiful faces and disarming smiles. They have one goal and one goal only: to kill off their unassuming friends.

The crime: talking unwilling parties (namely me) into running 5K races.

At first it may sound innocent, enjoyable even. Little do you know that you are in no kind of shape to run a 5K. The culprits try to tell you that because you’ve been doing 2.5 miles on the stair step for the last few months that you are in great shape. They try to say that running isn’t much different. You believe them at first so do not panic when you bend to the pressure and sign up a week before the race. How hard can it be, you think, it's called a "fun" run?

Reality sets in when you switch from the stair stepper to the treadmill and barely make it a mile before your side burns with cramps so debilitating that you have to stop. Your body nearly kills you again the next morning when you wake up in more pain than you’ve been in since the morning after childbirth. But you force yourself to run again that night, knowing that the 5K is coming fast and you are not only going to die, but make a complete fool out of yourself in the process.

The day of the race comes and you haven’t completed more than a mile and a half on the treadmill without having to stop and walk. That’s okay, the culprits say, lots of people will be walking part of the race. One even says there’s no way she can run a full 3.1 miles and will probably end up walking some of it as well. This thought makes you feel better.

Then the race. You put on your music hoping to drown out the sounds of your labored breathing, hoping for some form of distraction. There is no distraction. Your burning lungs tell you that you shouldn’t be doing this. The weatherman said it was supposed to be 102 degrees that day and even though it’s only 7:30 in the morning your face feels like it’s already surpassed that temperature and you haven’t even reached the halfway point. You have to stop and walk even though the culprits (or any other runners) haven’t so much as slowed down. Taylor Swift blasting in your earpieces is trying to make you happy, but failing miserably.

Eventually, through running, speed walking, and stumbling, you claw your way through the finish lines. The culprits (who have been done for 5 minutes) are already talking about a Breast Cancer run they want to do in October. You’re choking down a slice of apple a volunteer gave you at the finish line, realizing that since the culprits didn’t kill you this time, they’re already looking for the next opportunity.

Thanks for the "fun" run, guys. You nearly accomplished your goal. :) Sarcasm aside, although the race wasn't something I'd necessarily put in my "fun" category, you two are always fun.

Monday, September 14, 2009

Wax? Really?

10 things I hate about you (New York). Okay, well not really 10, because I wouldn’t be able to think of that many. But at least 2. ☺

So this isn’t necessarily New York’s problem, but since it has one, it's on my list (and it does not want to be on my list). The wax museum. Really? Wax celebrities? Perhaps I wouldn’t loathe the wax museum so much if my husband didn’t LOVE it. Not only do we have to go, but we have to spend hours there. HOURS posing with fake celebrities, setting up fake scenes, walking around fake-land. Ugh.

My husband has a crush on famous people. Not just a few famous people (like someone else I know [I love you Hugh Jackman]) but ALL of them. Seriously, he does not discriminate, if you are famous, he loves you and must take a picture with the wax version of you (that by the way looks only slightly similar to the real person).
Here are a few of his pictures (there are so many more):

This is how fake James Bond and I felt about the whole experience:

I was too busy seeing real famous people on this trip to be impressed by fake versions of them. Saw this guy on the airplane:

Yeah, we shared a moment. And by “moment” I mean, I smiled at him, he smiled back, and I thought to myself, you were so good in Felicity. Tell me that isn’t magical? If I hadn’t prominently displayed my wedding ring, I’m sure he would’ve climbed over his really hot girlfriend to talk to me.

So, what about you? Wax museum fan or not? (by the way, this is a test. If you answer wrong you will be added to my list)

Update: If you can't get enough of my husband's antics, follow this link to see more pics: Crazy husband.

Thursday, September 10, 2009


Wahoo! I've been chosen. So Michelle probably thinks I'm the laziest person in the universe (and she'd be right) because she gave me these awards like a month ago. I don't want her to think I don't appreciate them, because I do. They make me feel so special.

The first one, the "Humane" award is for someone who loves laugher and writers in equal measure. I asked Michelle if the award was combining the words "humor" and "insane" (makes sense to me).

The Rules:
*Accept and post the award to your blog
*Link to the person from whom you received it
*Pass the award to 5 other blogs that are worthy of this acknowledgement
*Let them know they've been chosen for this award

I pass along the humor-insane award to a new girl in the blogging world (or at least new on my radar)--Jade. Because she likes to hide in fire cupboards at work to get some writing done. Now that is both funny and insane. :)

The second award is the Kreativ Blogger award. This ones a little harder for me because I have to name 7 things about myself that you may not know.

The Rules:
1. Thank the person who nominated you for this award. (Thanks Michelle)
2. Copy the logo and place it on your blog.
3. Link to the person who nominated you for this award.
4. Name 7 things about yourself that people might not know.
5. Nominate 7 Kreativ Bloggers.
6. Post links to the 7 blogs you nominate.
7. Leave a comment on each of the blogs letting them know they have been nominated.

Okay 7 things about me:

1. When I was 19 I got my nose pierced (don't tell my mother-in-law).
2. I have 4 kids--3 of which are girls and 3 of which were over 9 pounds at birth.
3. I have absolutely no fashion sense. My two sisters got all those genes.
4. My closet is as messy now as it was in high school (that's scary).
5. I love to wakeboard, but have never been snow boarding (or skiing) in my life.
6. Smug is one of my favorite emotions.
7. I was a major drama geek in high school.

For this award I nominate Renee Pinner. She's also new so it would be fun to hear seven random things about her.

Yes, I'm only nominating one person for each because it seems like everyone I know has gotten a lot of awards lately. :)

Friday, September 4, 2009


I love to travel because generally kid-free travel equals reading time for me. And I love to read. This vacation I especially had a lot of down time. I mean, there is only so much walking you can do before your feet become useless. (Plus I spent a lot of time in airplanes and on trains) So I was able to read an entire series (3 books) on my vacation. This series to be specific:

It was an entertaining well-crafted series. She did a great job with her characters. They were amazing, and I recommend the books.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

I interrupt my NY posts to make a special announcement

My friend, Natalie Whipple has an agent! The Nathan Bransford. If you're not a writer it might be hard to appreciate how big of an accomplishment this is. Let's just say there are three major steps in getting a book into the bookstores for all to read.

First step: Write a book.
Second step: Land an agent.
Third step: Land a publisher.

The second step helps you with the third step. In fact, it's nearly impossible to do the third step, without the second. Soooo, if you have a minute, hop on over to Natalie's blog and give her a much deserved congratulations. I just happen to be one of the few who have read all her books (I state smugly) and I know she has earned this. I couldn't be happier that this has finally happened for Natalie. This girl is full of creative genius and she's a super supportive and amazing friend to her fellow writers as well.